No one told me it would be painful..
No one told me building character would cost me life
apparently for me to grow I just realized somethings have to go
I have to kill “Self-seeking Sinmi”, I have to kill MY WILL.
I just checked the dictionary for the meaning of sacrifice;
It means to give up, to forego..
To surrender or destroy something desirable
I have destroyed my appetite
I have destroyed my pleasures
I have destroyed my sleep
I have destroyed my time
I have destroyed my energy
That seems to be all the world demands from me today
Just one thing yet so profound
And amidst all this rambling and soul bearing
I hear a voice in my head saying “you’re just starting Sinmi”
By the time you’re done on earth you’ll be “sacrifice” personified
Everyone is always saying be responsible,
What they don’t tell you is the meaning of that word
And what it does to you.
You see, responsibility will break you.
It will rob you of your will
It confines you to commitments and cripples you
It makes fun such a distant word until you’re ready to redefine it’s meaning
Responsibility is not mundane
And “ease” is not in any way synonymous with it
No one told me independence meant being able to stand ALONE
Being Light comes at a price
You’re steady cleaning the wounds of others whilst yours lie open and untreated
You’re so busy solving the problems of others whilst you’re drowning in a pool of your own
Why Because? “WONDER Sinmi”
I mean how can anything be wrong with me?
You know the beauty of this process?
He’s presence becomes much more glaring than ever before
Whilst you busy yourself running around the affairs of his children
He himself takes care of you
You learn to trust him because he’s your ONLY ally in the real sense
And at this point I have the brightest smile on…
God has my back!
And that’s really all I need.
So, keep the demands rolling in guys!
Keep the questions coming!
Keep the expectations high!
And as for you; life? Keep the lemons coming.